Mend Her Fences ♥ (Part 2 to Broken Hearted)

Chase’s alarm clock began to beep incessantly, causing him to slowly stir underneath his soft mountain of blankets. He groaned and whirled over, grabbing for his phone to stop the annoying noise but instead knocked it to the ground. It flipped over and thudded on the carpet, continuing its cadence of waking as Chase groaned louder and threw his upper body over the edge of his bed, managing to snatch the phone up and turning off the alarm for good. He blinked a few times, his consciousness shaking off its shroud of sleepiness, and he let out a deep breath, hoisting himself back into his bed, sitting up against his headboard. He ran a hand through his tousled hair, pushing the wavy curls off his forehead as he unlocked his phone and opened his messages. 

Nothing. 

A deep sadness settled on his heart that sent a spidering sensation of pain throughout this chest, like a crack on a windshield spreading out from a tiny pinpoint of damage. It had been two days since his encounter in Avery’s bedroom where she had sobbed on her floor after screaming at him, telling him she was tired of him and that he didn’t truly care about her. His brain had kindly hooked onto those words and burrowed them deep into his mind, replaying them against his will and only furthering the pain.

He silently left his bed and flung the phone onto the mattress as he picked his soft gray t-shirt off of the floor and tugged it over his head. He had tossed and turned all night, his head full of nightmares and his heart full of discord. He had begun to overheat from anxiety and in his tornado of restlessness had yanked the shirt off and thrown it to the floor. He was now cold all over due to the icy sorrow that laced his skin with biting pinpricks. 

He gathered his shower caddy, towel, and a change of clothes and exited his bedroom to venture down the hall to the bathroom he shared with his two room-mates, Jackson and Elliot. It was Sunday, the 30th of March, and while Chase had work, his roomies had the day off and were still snug in their beds. The silence hung heavy over Chase’s head as he shut the bathroom door and started up the shower, the warm stream the only sound that caressed his ears. He rinsed off, his mind both fast and slow, mulling over the day’s agenda and yet stuck on the past two days that had haunted him. 

Avery had remained radio silent since their fight - if it could even be called a fight. He had called Marie yesterday, and all she had told him was that Avery was not okay, but was safe. She had attended another counseling session and had been wandering the house like a lost soul, tearstains on her face and shadows under her eyes. Marie had told him she had barely spoken since her outburst at Chase, and that she had mostly stayed in her room, curled up in bed and ignoring her mom’s pleas to eat, get some sun, or at least text Chase. Marie had eventually let go of the hope she could get Avery to talk to her and did not know what she had said to her counselor - if she had said anything at all - since those sessions were kept private and confidential. Chase had listened quietly, his heart aching for his best friend and little sister, and had simply thanked Marie for letting him know before ending the call. 

The shower steam soaked into his skin as he exited the bathroom, now clothed in his favorite blue jeans and a clean white t-shirt, his black-brown hair curling around his ears and making him look like a forest nymph who had just stepped out of a misty morning that had left beads of dew on his face which framed his tired, darkened eyes. He wiped away the stray droplets, put his caddy away, hung up his towel to dry, and began lacing up his black Converse to leave the apartment and embark on his way to work. He grabbed his keys and green bookbag, slinging it over his shoulder and locking his bedroom door before descending the stairs and making his way out to his Jeep. He normally ate breakfast at his work, Rejavanate, a small coffeehouse that rested on his college campus. Rejavanate had actually been his brainchild, and late in his freshman year he had gotten a petition going to create and establish the coffee shop on campus in order to provide students with a cozy space to mingle, study, and overall feel both more at ease and more caffeinated. 

He became the manager of the shop and worked every day except Fridays, his customary hang-out day with Avery. He loved his job and got along swimmingly with his co-workers, a ragtag bunch of students who were enthusiastic about pastries, lo-fi music, and latte art. He enjoyed his work and loved chatting with the students who frequented the plush couches, chairs, and corners of the shop, from regulars to freshmen to people off the street – the shop was open to the students and to the general public. Normally he felt chipper when heading into work, but today a gloom clung to his body, following him from his apartment and on his commute to the shop. He parked in the first spot he could find and swung out of his Jeep, trudging his way to the glass doors and inhaling the earthy smell of freshly brewed coffee. His co-manager, Christina, usually showed up a bit earlier than Chase did and got right to work on opening the shop: turning on the lights, plumping up the pillows on the couches and chairs, and getting the coffee going. The pastry order for the day would arrive a little after Chase did, and he and Christina would chat as they set up the pastry display and poured themselves lattes, espresso, or whatever caffeine concoction they wished.

Chase entered the shop and its warmth and sweet smells enveloped him. His body felt right at home, but his mind was miles away, the vinyl loop of Avery’s voice spinning on the record player within his brain. Christina popped up from below the cash register, having just finished stocking the shelves below the register with cups, straws, and napkins to hand to customers. 

“Good morning, Walker!” she grinned. She had a quirk of calling him by his last name. 

“Hey, Christina,” Chase mumbled, not even able to attempt a smile as he entered the employees-only door to the back kitchen, dropping his bookbag on the chrome countertop where the staff kept their personal belongings. 

Christina’s face displayed a mixture of puzzlement and worry. Chase usually came in with a big smile and a perky attitude, greeting her with a wave and cheery ‘good morning.’ Christina studied him as he washed his hands – his shoulders were tense, his eyes void of their usual glow, and his head drooped. 

“What’s up, Chase?” she asked gently, switching to his first name, knowing it was serious if Chase was this down. 

“Uh…just a rough night,” he replied, drying his hands and taking his brown apron off its hook, slipping it over his head and tying the strings behind his back. He brushed past Christina and entered the front space of the shop behind the register. He spotted the brown box that the pastry deliveryman brought for him and Christina every morning – it contained two egg croissant sandwiches, complete with ham and cheese. The pastries must have come early. 

He didn’t feel hungry, but he knew he needed to eat something in order to avoid operating on an empty stomach in conjunction with a broken heart. 

Christina watched him as he absent-mindedly chewed away at his food, examing him from head to toe.

 

This is so not like Walker, she thought to herself. What the heck could have happened to make him this blue?

She furrowed her brow and pondered for a bit more before she shook herself out of her stupor and perked up her shoulders, a smile returning to her face. She took her place at the espresso machine and began pouring oat milk into a frothing pitcher.  

“Hey, I’m gonna make myself a honey latte. What are you feeling like having this morning?” she asked, leveling out the ground espresso she had just collected from the grinder and attaching it to the machine to pull the shots. 

“Um…I’ll do the same if you don’t mind,” Chase replied, his cheeks full of croissant and his eyes still downcast. 

“Sure!” she chirped, pouring a second cup of oat milk and steaming it, expertly working her way through crafting the drinks. 

“How’s Avery doing? She coming in today?” 

Christina knew that it was both Avery’s birthday and that she normally came to the shop on Sundays anyway. She turned to look at Chase and saw that his demeanor had seemed to worsen even further, the darkness surrounding him becoming more palpable. Christina froze in her task of pouring the hot milk into the white mug in her hand. 

“Chase?”

He remained silent. He placed the wrapper of his sandwich down on the counter, the mangled remains nestled in the crinkled paper. His shoulders began to tremble slightly, and he gripped the counter behind him, knuckles turning white.

And then he began to cry.

Christina was shocked, having never seen Chase so sad and disturbed. She had seen him cry before, but more with happy tears as he celebrated with customers who were finally graduating, who had just gotten engaged or married, had just had a baby, or had accomplished a goal. He always had a smile on, even with the tears, and truly enjoyed when his regulars eagerly shared their life with him. She immediately set down both the mug and milk on the counter and approached Chase, wiping her hands on her apron. 

“Chase, oh my goodness, what’s wrong?” she asked gently, her eyes full of concern. 

Something happened with Avery, she thought, internally kicking herself for not thinking of that sooner. She knew how close Chase was with Avery, and that they were nearly inseparable. She secretly hoped that the two of them would begin a dating relationship, but knew they strictly viewed one another as big brother and little sister which was something she respected, especially considering that Chase was a catch and had many secret and not-so-secret admirers both on and off-campus. 

“Is Avery okay?” she asked tenderly, laying a hand on his shoulder as he continued to shed tears. 

Chase just shook his head, the waves of his hair bouncing, enunciating his movement.  

“Is it okay if I asked what happened?”

Chase heaved a deep sigh and finally raised his head to look at her, his silver-blue eyes glimmering with tears.

“She…she yelled at me the other day,” he whispered. “When I went over to hang out with her on Friday, she seemed really off. She ended up losing it and screaming at me. She told me she’s tired of me, and that she thinks I only hang out with her to babysit her and because her mom asks me to because she’s scared Avery will hurt…kill…herself like her dad. And she asked me to leave – she screamed at me to go away.” Chase broke down harder, putting his head in his hands. 

Christina quietly listened, her hand still on his shoulder and he shook with his sobs.

“A-and,” he continued. “I left and heard her crying because her window was open. She kept asking herself why: why is she sick, why does she hurt those she loves, why is she the way that she is. And it hurt. It broke my heart to hear her say those things. I’m not mad at her because I know she’s in pain, but it still hurt me so bad. I called Marie and she told me that Avery has been opening up more to her counselor, especially about her dad’s death…Avery believes he didn’t love her and that he chose to leave her, and she’s angry she inherited his illness. I guess that it just opened a wound inside her, and she lost it at me.” 

“Oh, Chase…I’m so sorry,” Christina said, her own heart aching at seeing Chase in distress. “You’re right, I can’t imagine the pain Avery is in, but I’m sorry she took it out on you.”

“It’s not her fault, I don’t blame her,” he replied tearfully. “I mean, I know it wasn’t okay of her to do, but I think she couldn’t stop herself. It’s like something overtook her and she just got so angry, and her pain just came pouring out. Marie said she didn’t mean anything she said, and I believe that, but it still hurts…so bad.” 

“Of course it does, it would hurt anyone to hear their best friend say they are tired of them or to go away,” Christina replied gently. “You are amazing for not blaming her or being angry at her, even though you got hurt. That takes deep patience and kindness, and you’re awesome for that, Chase. Have you heard from her since Friday?”

“No,” he said quietly. “Nothing at all.”

Christina nodded, a sad smile on her face. 

“She might just need more time. I know the silence is probably killing you. She’ll come back around; you know Avery. She’s headstrong, but she’s sweet as pie, and she’ll apologize and mend her fences. Unfortunately, she might be hating herself for exploding at you, and I’m sure on top of talking about her dad, she’s in a world of hurt herself.”

“Marie said that,” he murmured. “She told me that Avery has basically gone mute. She won’t eat, she won’t talk, she just wanders around the house like a ghost. She somehow made it to another counseling session yesterday, but I’m not sure what was discussed, and neither does Marie. And today’s her birthday…I wanted to celebrate with her.”

Christina gently patted his shoulder, her smile turning warmer. 

“You know what? I’ll bet you any tips I get today that she’ll be here.”

Chase’s eyes darted up.

“You really think so?”

“I think I know so,” she said, tapping her left temple. “I’m not one to place bets, but my actual money is on this one.”

She turned back to the mug she had abandoned, the pulled espresso shots waiting patiently. She steamed some fresh milk, squeezed honey into the mug, whisked the espresso with the honey, and poured a perfect latte, complete with a foamy white heart on top. She handed the warm mug to Chase with a gentle smile. 

“Chin up, okay? Just you wait and see, she’ll be here.”

A hint of a smile crossed Chase’s face, and he began to sip the latte, the heart pulling towards his lips.

“This is amazing, Christina. Thank you.”

“You are ever so welcome,” she replied, bowing slightly with a grin on her face. She set to fixing herself her own honey latte and peered up at the clock. 

“Wow, 9 AM already and no customers? Odd,” she said. 

“Now that you mention it, it is super quiet around here,” Chase affirmed, setting his latte down and poking his head out to look through the windows. 

He didn’t see any students wandering the lawn outside, and no new cars had appeared in the parking lot. He knew it was Sunday, but there was usually a small morning crowd who came in to grab a coffee before they headed to church, or students who wanted to get their studying started early. Chase and Christina were usually the only staff working on Sundays unless either was sick or busy and needed a replacement – sometimes Isaac, a sophomore who had been working at the shop since the middle of his freshman year, would come in if it was projected to be a busier weekend.  

“It’s not a holiday, right?” Christina asked, looking at the calendar hung on the wall in the back. “I swear I’m not crazy,” she muttered. 

“Well, you might be a little crazy,” Chase retorted, raising his eyebrows. 

“There’s the Walker I know!” Christina beamed, happy to see that Chase’s spirits appeared to be rising. 

They began to chat as they sipped away at their lattes and Christina ate her own croissant sandwich, and the minutes ticked on. Eventually, a few customers came in, dressed in their church clothes, and a few students trickled in, yawning and looking dreary-eyed as they eagerly awaited their morning fix of caffeinated goodness. 

Soon it was noon, and there were about eight students spread throughout the shop at different tables, their laptops and books open, switching between chatting with their companions, sipping their drinks, and steadily typing away. 

Chase’s hope of Avery arriving had begun to dwindle, and sensing this shift in his mood, Christina put him to work washing the few dishes that had been used for pastries and the mugs with coffee stains lacing their insides. He worked away at the sink, his mind once again wandering as he robotically scrubbed the dishes, dunking them in the soapy depths before drying them to a faint shine. Suddenly, Christina popped her head in, her eyes alight with glee. 

“She’s here.”

Chase’s head snapped up, nearly dropping the mug he was holding on the floor. 

“What?” he asked breathlessly, his heart pounding in his chest. 

“Avery just pulled in and parked,” she replied, quickly taking the mug from his wet hands. “Get out there!” 

She overtook the task of washing the dishes as Chase washed and dried his hands quickly before breezing his way to the register. Christina was thankful she had a view and was in hearing range if Avery came in. She wanted to know how this played out. 

Chase gazed out the window at the parking lot, and sure enough, Avery’s small blue car was parked just a few spaces away from his Jeep. He saw that she was still in the driver’s seat, looking down at what he guessed was her phone. His hands shook slightly and he felt like electricity was running through his veins, sparking him to life and triggering his nerves. His stomach did backflips and his heart was pounding like a snare drum. He felt like he might puke. He cast a desperate look over his shoulder at Christina, who had just finished all the dishes and was coming out of the back to join him. 

“She’s still out there?” she asked, looking out to the lot to see where Avery was. 

“Yeah, she’s just sitting there,” he replied, his voice quaking with anxiety. 

“Go,” Christina whispered, trying to act casual to avoid gaining attention from the patrons scattered about the shop. 

“What?” Chase replied dumbly. 

Christina nudged him with her elbow, lightly pushing him towards the doors. 

“Go out there!” she whispered-yelled. “She showed up, she obviously came for you. I told you I had faith in this bet.” 

Chase froze, his mouth working but no words escaping. 

Christina lightly rolled her eyes and sighed, snapping her fingers in Chase’s face. 

“Earth to Space Cadet Walker. Please begin your mission,” she quipped, once again pushing him towards the doors. 

Chase snapped to and began nervously moving towards the front of the store, exiting the shop and stepping out into the mild March air. It was like he had entered a brand new planet and he felt choked of oxygen, his heart only beating harder in his chest. He began walking towards Avery’s car, her head still down. He approached her door, and just as he had two days ago on her bedroom window, he gently rapped on the glass of the car window. Avery’s head shot up and her eyes widened with a mixture of terror and shame. She fumbled around, her phone falling out of her hands as she scrambled to unbuckle her seatbelt and bend down to retrieve the device, accidentally bumping her head against her steering wheel in her rush and beeping the car horn. Chase couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle, a sudden tenderness warming over him. Avery nervously flicked her eyes up at him before shakily reaching for her door handle. Chase beat her to it and opened the door, the barrier between him and Avery now removed. They stared at each other in silence for what seemed like an eternity. 

“I-…um, hi,” Avery mumbled quietly, her eyes still full of what seemed like fear. 

“Hey there,” Chase replied, his own voice faint. 

Silence. 

Finally, Avery left her seat and stood, scooting around Chase as he shut the car door. They faced one another, Avery’s bottom lip beginning to quiver.

“I’m…I’m so sorry, Chase,” she managed to choke out before bursting into tears and falling into him.

 

Chase immediately hugged her tight, his own eyes welling once again as he held her close, his heart returning to a steady beat.

“I didn’t mean what I said,” she gasped. “I messed up. I didn’t want to lose control, it just happened…I couldn’t stop myself. There’s so much happening, it’s so loud in my head and I can’t do it all on my own, I can’t deal with all this pain. I feel so lost, and I pushed away the only place where I feel found. You’re my compass, Chase. And I hurt you, and I’m so sorry. I hate myself so much, and I just-”

“Please don’t say that Ave,” Chase cut her off, pulling her back to look in her eyes. “Please don’t hate yourself. I was never mad at you, and I forgive you. I know you didn’t mean what you said, and…your mom told me what’s been going on. About your dad and your counseling and your struggles. I’m sorry that I didn’t think to check on you or reach back out after. I…I was hurt, but I was never angry at you. Not even for a moment. I’m so happy you’re here, you have no idea.”

Chase smiled brightly, his tears sparkling in the sun, and Avery fell into him once again, squeezing him tight. 

“I missed you,” she whispered. 

“I missed you, too,” Chase murmured into her hair, resting his chin on her head. 

They hugged for a while, Avery’s crying subsiding and Chase’s tears drying. Meanwhile, Christina watched from behind the glass doors of Rejavanate, wearing a joyful smile as she saw the two best friends embrace. 

Avery stopped trembling and stepped back, wiping her eyes and smiling up at Chase. 

“I was so scared to come here, but I knew I had to. I needed to see you, and I apologize and I just…thank you. My mom told me you heard me through my window, and that you stayed until you called her. That means so much to me.”

“I wasn’t sure what to do, honestly. I’m just happy you’re okay, and that you’re here,” he smiled. “Oh, and, happy birthday, Ave,” Chase beamed, tapping her nose lightly. 

Avery laughed and rolled her eyes. 

“I nearly forgot,” she sighed, toying with her opal ring. “I never did like my birthday.”

“But why not? It’s an amazing day to celebrate – the day you came into this world and wowed everyone with your presence,” Chase said dramatically, yet with complete truth in his tone. 

Avery giggled, a twinge of sadness mixed in her voice. 

“It was a day like any other,” she replied. “Just like any other March, but with one more human added to the world.”

“I beg to differ,” Chase said gently. “You are important, Ave. Your birthday is meaningful to me, your mom, and to everyone who knows and loves you. It…it was even meaningful to your dad.”

Avery froze, her eyes falling down to look at the ground. Chase’s breath caught, knowing he may have crossed a line. 

Avery got a faint smile on her face, and she looked back up at Chase.

“You’re right,” she whispered. “It probably did mean everything to him.”

Chase looked surprised, a tinge of pride filling his chest coupled with a rising tide of joy. 

“Things have been looking up, huh, Ave?”

“Quite literally,” she replied. “My counselor told me I should keep my head up - I look at my shoes so often. She said it will help boost my confidence and make my mood lift, so I’ve been practicing…it feels different. Good, but different. And…I’ve been feeling better. I still hurt a lot, but she told me that time can heal, as long as I work on progressing forward and working on myself. And I really want to. I thought about what you said, how we all change, and that we can either fight it or embrace it. I want to embrace it, Chase. I want to lean all in, and think of each day as a chance to learn and improve, so I can be better and stronger and so…I can hurt you less,” she finished with a whisper. Her eyes dipped down momentarily before bouncing back up to meet his. “And, I know what I want for my birthday. I’m going to get it tonight, after your shift. I was hoping you would go with me,” she said, looking hopeful.

Chase smiled, putting his arm around her shoulders.

“I’ve got nothing planned, nothing but time with you,” he smiled. 

She grinned and they began making her way towards the coffeehouse, the afternoon ticking by as they walked through the doors. Christina was standing at the register and beaming. 

“Is that Avery Nicholson, the birthday girl here in the flesh?” she dramatically gasped as she leaned over to hug Avery. 

Avery laughed, ducking under Chase’s arm to return Christina’s affectionate gesture. 

“Yes, I’m alive,” Avery replied, lightly laughing. “I’m sure Chase filled you in on these past couple of days.”

Christina glanced up at Chase before looking back at Avery, an apologetic smile crossing her face.

“Yeah, he did, but I’ll have you know I was rooting for you showing up today,” Christina said. “I’m so sorry you’re going through the thick of it right now. You’re one tough cookie and brave as they come. And for that, your birthday drink is on me – whatcha feeling like?” 

Avery smiled softly, her eyes full of joy. 

“Thank you, Christina,” she said softly. “I would super love a serrano if you don’t mind.”

“Ah yes, the Avery classic,” Christina said, scooping ice into a cup and setting it under the cold brew tap. “Coming right up!” 

Soon, Avery had a cup swirled with cold brew, chocolate sauce, and oat milk in her hand and was chatting away with Christina and Chase, back to her bubbly self. The hours ticked by until it was 5 PM, and the coffee shop was closed. Avery sat on a chair, scrolling through birthday messages while Chase and Christina cleaned and closed up. The sun was setting low in the distance, the sky pink and orange, its faint light streaking in through the windows. 

“Hey, you get going, okay? I can finish up here,” Christina said, hanging up her apron and going to close up the register.

“Are you sure?” Chase asked, hanging his own apron up and watching Christina rubber-band the bills.

“Absolutely,” Christina replied firmly, looking up at Chase, her hazel eyes serious. “It’s her birthday, and I have the feeling you and she have more talking you need to do. Call it a woman’s intuition.” 

Chase glanced over at Avery, who was smiling at her phone and munching away at a cheese Danish, a few crumbs dotting her cheeks.

“Thank you, Christina,” Chase said, his voice full of genuine gratitude. 

“Get out of here, Walker,” Christina replied, shoving Chase playfully. 

Chase scooted to the back and gathered his bookbag, pushing his way through the swinging doors that led to the main area of the shop.

“You ready, Ave?” he asked.  

She beamed up at him, her sea-glass eyes aglow and crumbs dribbling off her cheek. 

“Mhm!” she managed around a mouth full of Danish, brushing the back of her hand across her face to wipe off the crumbs. 

Chase laughed as she finished the pastry off and stood, walking by his side to leave the shop.

“Bye, Christina! Thank you so much!” Avery called, waving as she exited the doors.

“Bye, Avery! Happy birthday!” Christina waved back, smiling brightly. 

Chase and Avery made their way to their respective cars, pausing before parting. 

“So, I’m just following behind you?” Chase asked, his fingers laced together with his hands behind his head.

“If you wanna come,” Avery said mysteriously, a grin on her face.

“Where the heck are we going? You’re acting strange,” Chase said, his eyebrows raising. 

“Oh…you’ll see.”

Avery turned on her heel and skipped off towards her car, her russet-red ponytail bouncing in the air. Chase chuckled to himself and lightly shook his head, swinging his arms down to his sides and meandering to his Jeep.

The two started their cars and pulled out of the parking lot, Chase trailing Avery as she drove off towards their downtown, not far from the college campus.

The sun slipped lower on the horizon, casting a golden glow that promised magic was coming. 

Avery’s birthday had just begun. 

♥

(To be continued...)

Image source: Tokyo Ghoul manga by Sui Ishida